Speaking Vibrantly - Kelly Martin Speaks

Happy 2012 everyone. It has felt like a very long time since I last posted. Lots of changes, lots of developments and some shifts in my communication style.

A couple of days ago I started posting videos on my You Tube channel. This week I have received my first 'dislikes' on my videos ever. And it is all because I decided to step from behind my comfort zone and speak passionately about my own opinions and thoughts on a certain topic.

When I posted it, some fear arose. It took a great deal of courage to be so honest and clear about what many could perceive as human flaws. As with my blog I know my channel is taking me in the direction of honesty, raw passion, opinions and strong communication.

The Gift - Sometimes It Is Not What We Expect It To Be

A week or so ago I had a dream where I received the message "unwrap yourself - you are the gift" (see video at bottom of post). And while I intellectually got it, some of it I found myself struggling with.

This past week has been an interesting time for me. On Thursday I celebrated the Winter Solstice. I had made the conscious decision to say goodbye to celebrating Christmas on the 25th of December, even though I had been celebrating that day for 34 years. It was an enlightening experience and took me to a place within myself where more feelings and emotions arose.

While it was a beautiful day on the Solstice, the weather was perfect, Mike and I had a long walk to Lassington Woods. We sat on a log and drank spiced cider and I did a little ritual, placing bird seed in and around the trees. It was also a very surreal experience to open gifts on that day and I found it a little difficult when family (of which I had told them well in advance and what I would be doing) responded with "OH! you have opened your gifts today."

Emptiness - The Path Of The Heart

Zen - Emptiness - Wholeness - Heart

It seems the path of the heart is what we all genuinely desire, deep down within us.

Home, Source, God, Creator - whatever we name or label the energy that creates all things has always resided within us. Yet most of us have been so easily distracted by the trappings of the ego, the mind and the desire of the surface self, that we've missed out on the wisdom of the deeper self. I know I have.

My own desires ranged from wanting my own home, car, relationship and the typical life society had me believe I wanted, to letting that all go and letting myself want what I felt I really wanted.  To travel the globe, independently.

Alone - Aloneness - Lonely - Seeking One's Own Light

I wanted to write a short update for my blog.
So how am I doing right now?

Well - letting it all unfold.  It is all I can do right now.

It's funny because all the things I used to do, all the behaviour or the choices I made, were choices made to make me feel better via feedback from the outside world. And as I allowed my life to unfold this past year, spending time alone, I still slipped back in to distracting myself with outer feedback, knowing deep down at some point in my journey that I must look to my own light, my own inner feedback for comfort, love, sustenance and awakening.

Looking For Love In All The Wrong Places

"When life is empty of this and that,

The more we hold on, the less we catch,

The life we once had, the life we once dreamed,

Falls by the wayside and is not what it seemed." 

- Kelly Martin, 2011

How many of us reach a crossroads in our lives and recognise the scenery, but notice instead of reaching the winning square, we've been transported back to square one ?

On Being Raw, Authentic, Controversial And Challenging

After grappling with something this week I recognised that it is time to be proud of my uniqueness. I browse around countless other sites on-line, blogs, websites, You Tube channels, Facebook pages etc etc.. and I sit and wonder: "Why do they have so many followers? What do they do that I do not?" And so it began, a thought process.

The Pendulum Swings : Accepting & Appreciating Your 'Negative' Traits

Are you bossy? Controlling? Manipulative? Arrogant? Patronising? Sarcastic? Naughty? Rebellious?..

When you berate yourself for these qualities did you know that you're imposing limits on yourself?

Have you considered certain personality traits deemed as flaws or weaknesses simply require your loving acceptance?

Painting My World - Looking Out The Window At The Canvas Of Life

From Starbright Creations (copyright2011)

Do you realise how much you paint this life you live? While I followed the law of attraction, create your reality, for a long time, nothing has come close to explaining the meaning of life until recently.

As I mentioned in my blog entry  'On Being A Victim - The Larger Perspective', this reality of form is an illusion of the senses. The picture is far wider, far bigger than I ever imagined. I had an inkling that life was limitless but I did not understand what exactly this meant. I had been pondering for a long time: 'What would I be without this body?' and I got back that I would be energy, pure energy, possibly light, much like the rays of the sun. And this train of thought has led to hundreds of questions. The more I ponder the more questions I have. The answers cannot be pinned down or held onto; they can only drift in and out as we open up more.

In the law of attraction and the create your reality teachings available, we would be encouraged to envision the life we want in pictures and feelings, imagining a world we would like to experience. Some may want a new car or house, some a relationship or more money; the list is endless on human desire yet the purest understanding I got from all of this was that desires are empty of substance when we are unable to make the most of where we are in the here and now.

Angels, Guides & Ascended Masters - An Illusion

(ChrisJohnBeckett-flikr - creative commons)

This post was inspired by Matt Khan (see Unmasking the Veil). His video on You Tube made me consider the  spiritual experiences I had over 10 years ago in more depth.

When I was fairly new to spirit and psychic experiences I was practising a lot of Reiki (Reiki is said to be a Japanese form of healing energy channelled through someone. I tend to see Reiki as simply energy that is focused through the body) and one evening I lay in bed and was pondering what angels, guides and ascended masters are. A question that kept arising was "are they more evolved/higher than me?" And at the bottom of my bed I saw an angel, a guide and an ascended master. They merged. I then realised they are all one energy and  different frequencies of light.

On Being A Victim - A Larger Perspective

Copyright 2011: Kelly Martin

This morning I had some old drama creep into my mind and I ran the train of thought until I was in panic mode. I won't go into details but it really put things into perspective regarding the bigger picture of life.

None of us are victims - we are not powerless to circumstances - we are not dis-empowered by people 'out there'.

No road is available to us unless we put it there in the first place.

I had a long walk today (around 3 hours), through ploughed, raw, open fields. The crops were gone; the soil had been turned. It was cold, the wind was blowing and I walked myself back into my power place. Within myself.

As I walked I reminded myself, what I see through these eyes is a movie of my own making.

Nothing can be in my movie without my say so,

What Is The Real 'New Year'?

Lately I have been exploring more ancient practices like Wicca and also investigating the reason we celebrate certain times of the year.


Many celebrations in the West appear to revolve around Christianity, yet mask many ancient Pagan holidays that have been going  a lot longer and then of course I was pondering New Year.


Since connecting more with the seasons and flowing with nature lately I am performing rituals and celebrations around the Moon cycle (connecting with the Goddess within) and the Pagan Sabbats*.


An upcoming Sabbat is that of Samhain (often known in the West as Halloween). In Pagan traditions Samhain is New Year's Eve and makes a lot more sense than the reasons behind the December 31st / 1st January New Year.

A Fear Of Dying

It is said the fear of dying is behind all fears and it probably is. Yet for 'me' it's not so much a fear of dying but more a fear of not living. I am writing this blog entry to objectify a rather unpleasant series of dreams I had last night. I dream very vividly, write them down and interpret them. This series felt like I needed to get them out of me to heal, balance and make peace.

In one of the dreams I was bitten on the finger by a spider. I woke up groaning as I really felt the spider's bite on my finger.

In the second dream I was in hospital. I was either given the news or already knew I was dying.